There’s nothing like having good friends at times like these. Saturday and Sunday were simply wonderful: both days I spent with my friends trying not to ruin their fun.
I don’t know if I succeeded at that, but at least it gave me time to think. Getting at home after meeting many friends and realize you’re all alone is not easy, though. For me it’s tough as hell – but I must do though with it. I’ll emerge stronger on the other side.
She knows I like her. I’m not sure she understands how much, but it’s a beginning. Now comes the really hard part: letting time take its course. I will certainly try to get closer to her, but by hard part I mean what I will do to myself. I think too much about this kind of stuff, measuring every action, pondering every word said, every possible hidden meaning, every minimal action, trying to make everything make sense. But, that’s the way I am. It can be changed, but it’s not easy nor is it fast. For example, here I am, writing my ass off, trying to explain to myself why did things come to this…
I just wish I could turn off my brain sometimes.